annanotbob's Diaryland Diary

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It's hard to get by, just upon a smile

Don't you hate it when you go somewhere full of very distinct people and before you've even started, you find yourself agreeing to some confidentiality bullshit about what happens in the room stays in the room. Honestly.

So apart from all that, the bit that surprised me about the writing workshop today was this. We did a bit of guided writing - you are in a forest, write about it, yeah yeah. You come to a clearing - and there was my lovely tent, all set up in a gorgeous green clearing, with my camp bed, and quilts and cushions and rugs and a fire all ready to go. 'You find a box - what's it like and what's in it?' I thought of a particular carved wooden box and started to write about noticing its unnaturally straight lines in amongst the irregular branches, but all I could see was a big old soggy cardboard box, so I gave in and wrote about that. When I went to look inside it, there was a baby. NOOOOO!!! I said to myself, I don't want a fucking baby, what's going on? I looked closer, trying to see if it could be something else and not a poxy fluffy kitten or a puppy, but it was still a baby and actually, it looked familiar, wrapped in a creamy woollen shawl, wearing a knitted bonnet - I could see the tiny stitches that held the ribbons. Wow. It was a baby I knew from ancient black and white photos, those ones that are mainly white border, stuck onto thick grey pages in dusty old albums. It was me. And I picked her up and sat with her asleep on my lap in front of the fire and then it was time to stop writing. Lordy lordy, that's what I say. By way of a change, instead of fucking hell.

Later Sara and I went for a meal in a noncey vegetarian restaurant and I was farting before we went in - I'm shocking now, honestly.

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12:27 a.m. - 17/09/2009

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