annanotbob's Diaryland Diary
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
OK, this is my last on the subject of old Len, I promise. Ren's back and he said this reduced him to tears - he's never been so moved by a performance. Him and most of the people round him. Sigh.
I am so proud of Ren:
You may not think it from that photo, where he looks wasted, but my boy has spent seven whole days surrounded by open and copious drugging and boozing and has stayed true to his path. Hallelujah indeed. He had a great time. Dot and her husband looked out for him - I just sent them a text thanking them and they replied 'He was a joy. We love him.' Proud, moi? Oh yes.
I had a review meeting with my care team today which was reassuring. I'm kind of in the foothills of the tier two recovery programme - the taking of the history, still not completed, the crisis management group - all that. Almost certain to throw up all kinds of unwelcome surprises. There are huge chunks of my life where things have hurtled along so quickly there's been no time to 'process' all sorts of big bloody stuff.
And they're all so nice, these people, and that in itself makes me cry. A is retiring and handing me over to H, but they've done such a smooth overlap that I feel more with H already. There's also J, who is fab and a bit of an old groover, like me.
I'm going to have more bad times over the coming months and really I don't know how to manage myself. I think art is the way to go, if I can find a way to make myself do it at the time that I most need to. I'm kitted out here like a fucking arts and crafts centre, what with Sara and all, but I hardly ever make anything. I will.
The comfort of small, old animals is good too:
Millie and Bob are both 9, which apparently makes them about my age and as keen to have a nap in the afternoon as me.
OK, I know that's more Len, but I commend it to you, utterly luscious, really. You'll love it. We are just spoilt rotten with utube, aren't we? Not 24 hours later and it's there for us all to see. Marvellous.
This is the view from my kitchen window, where I slump over the dishes
and that circle of greenery bottom left is the cut and cum come again lettuce that dear fabulous stepfordtart gave gorgeous me for my birthday and she didn't even know it had a rude name!! What are the chances of that happening?
When I do the mosaic course, I want to make a piece to go outside, opposite the window there. A free-standing piece of something or other.
Sweet dreams, dear ones xxx
|10:35 p.m. - 30/06/2008
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------