annanotbob's Diaryland Diary
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It might as well rain until September
This has been the best birthday I've had in years. The party yesterday left me feeling truly loved and blessed to have so many really good people in my life.
I didn't do much in the way of picture taking as I was into fully being there for once, rather than storing it up for later while I'm still in it. Sara took it upon herself to entertain the little boys with a great tattoo kit:
Tony is so skinny - shocking. We were pleased to realise we had people from every decade of life from the under 10s to the 60s - like a wedding it was, but without the punch-ups. Which is not strictly true as Fran belted Martin pretty hard at one point, but it didn't develop into anything much.
There was dancing of sorts in the end, if only me and Marcus:
and quite widespread hat-wearing:
I was wearing quite a nice party frock before the pics got going, but you'll have to take my word for that.
Today I woke early and had breakfast in the garden in the sunshine. The house smelt like a pub and was awash with debris and I felt as rough as I deserved to after carrying on like that. That was the first time I've done mdma or e for ages - well over a year, maybe even two and I hate to admit it but it was fucking lovely. I mean, it's well dodgy, I can see that, to be able to switch from barely contained anxiety to an overwhelming sense of total well-being, just by doing a line, but it's a good place to visit now and then. Nice and dancy too, and in a way that left me at ease with my mum-dancing in front of all the cool-school twenty-somethings (who can all just fuck right off).
So I spent the morning gradually clearing and cleaning the place, but feeling quite zen about it all. The food all went apart from the hummus, which I'd made and was absolutely horrible. I kept trying to make it taste of something, but I'd lost the memory of how to do it and didn't think of looking in a recipe book. Ah well. I'd saved my cards and pressies for today as otherwise I'd have just had a hangover and a mess. Lovely, lovely. My brother baked me a birthday cake, coffee and walnut, with a ballerina candle.
Grateful for:
a peaceful day; lots of love; new reef flip-flops; lots of nice birthday comments - thanks guys; chocolate cosmos in flower
Proud of:
Throwing a party at which people had fun - ha, that's a good thing to be proud of, not just getting dressed, for once!
Sweet dreams dear ones xx
10:53 p.m. - 16/06/2008
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